I am Comfortable!!
Are you Comfortable?
I am seating here pretending to be so busy while the
maid goes about everything, I can see that she is so exhausted, trying to
finish her assignments. She picks up the plate that I just used to eat before
bring me a cold glass of water. And I surely could lend her a hand but I am Comfortable.
Plus I am tired, I’ve had a long day too!! I am the king of excuses. She asks
me for just 1k so she could buy tomatoes for the food I am to eat but I refuse
to give it to her simply because I need to have enough on me as I go to see my
girlfriend plus I do not really like the way she cooks, how ungrateful.
Speaking of my girlfriend, I know that all she desires of me is tender, loving,
care and for me to make her feel like the queen that she really is. The kind
she hardly gets because we seldom meet. She expect me to take initiative and do
the small things like calling to check on her but here I am letting my ego grab
the best of me, plus wasn’t it me who called yesterday and the day before? “If
she doesn’t call I won’t” I mean, I am Comfortable!! I can’t believe I
process my thoughts like this. She has always been there for me, reached out to
me even when my family shut me out and couldn’t help me in my desperate times
of need and further more loved me for me and I can’t even get myself to go over
make her feel appreciated because I am Comfortable!!
My mother needs me to carry out some errands for her
in town but I have the latest episode of the big bang theory to watch and perhaps,
I missed the previous one and so, being the king of excuses, I lie to her that
I have a headache so I can chill and remain Comfortable.
I was walking to church the other day head high
because there were so many beggars on the street, one of them had the guts to
come say hello and hardly had he popped the question than I said to Him “GO AND
WORK” and I walked on thinking to myself “Why give my money to such a one who
is just going to spend it buying drugs or alcohol. Go someplace where there are
people in the same predicament you are, you do not make me feel safe.” And now there
is this Christian Brother who knows I like to help people and because of that,
He thinks I will only assist if he comes to the stipple. Man!! Seriously, I am
trying to be Comfortable.
Dear God, if you’re listening, I have one single
request, make me less Comfortable. I do not want this
bullet proof vest. I act like I am trying my best but I am not even giving
half. I am broken and disassembled and I tremble at the thought of standing
before you and hearing You ask me about my life. About how I was too Comfortable
to minister to our maid, my precious girlfriend, a Christian brother in need or
even that beggar. Yet again, what will I do, what I am I going to say then when
You ask me why I never sat to talk with You except for when something was
broken and I was going through a very difficult time? And I used You like a
tool, turned you into a genie and Your word into a fortune cookie like I am
doing right now. Expecting You to do something when I’ve been too Comfortable
to even spend time with You. I have a new bible, one I have always dreamed of
having and it keeps inviting me but I refuse to RSVP because I am too Comfortable
reading one of those Christian clichés off Facebook or playing FIFA 14. It’s
always convicting me, it makes me feel like I should be doing something rather than
what I am currently doing. Who cares if what I am currently doing is nothing
because I am too Comfortable!!
But deep down I know You didn’t call me to a life of
comfort. I was bought by blood and pain so that through You, I may live a godly
life. Anyone who wants to live all out for Christ is in for a lot of trouble;
there’s no getting around it.
I claim to follow a Saviour who had no place to lay
His head yet I get bitter if I can’t sleep in my own bed. I am a lying
self-lover, loving life unless it leaves my comfort zone. I am a hot-headed hypocrite
hating he who has the audacity to hold me accountable for following the
footsteps I hear in my own head. I am as good as dead if I continue down this
path I am on toward a life of uncompromising comfort. I am really uncomfortable
with those who give 5% but Comfortable with me giving 10. I am Comfortable
with giving to compassion or any child care ministry but not with going down
the street to a family in need and showing them compassion. I am very Comfortable
with attending church on Sunday but not with serving on any other day. I am Comfortable
with interacting with those who speak fluent English and possibly went to cool
schools but not intermingling with others. I am Comfortable with being
around people who share the same beliefs I do but not being around those who
might have different views. I am very Comfortable to take a minute and
help another man but not if that man is in love with another man.
A Comfortable death, or a purposeful
Are you Comfortable?
Yes I am Comfortable!
Very Too Comfortable!